Intentions by Deborah Heiligman.
Audience/Genre : Young Adult/Contemporary.
Publication : August 14th 2012 by Knopf Books for Young Readers.

Rachel thought she was grown up enough to accept that no one is perfect. Her parents argue, her grandmother has been acting strangely, and her best friend doesn't want to talk to her. But none of that could have prepared her for what she overheard in her synagogue's sanctuary.

Now Rachel's trust in the people she loves is shattered, and her newfound cynicism leads to reckless rebellion. Her friends and family hardly recognize her, and worse, she can hardly recognize herself. But how can the adults in her life lecture her about acting with kavanah, intention, when they are constantly making such horribly wrong decisions themselves? This is a witty, honest account of navigating the daunting line between losing innocence and entering adulthood—all while figuring out who you really want to be.

Intentions was such a messy read!

I spent the first five minutes trying to figure out what on earth was going on and the next ten minutes wondering why the protagonist just wouldn't stop talking about the Rabbi. The first 20 pages of this book had me thinking that the whole book was about the Rabbi, which, it's not.

Okay, you probably have no idea what I'm talking about. Let me explain, Intentions does not feel like you're starting at the beginning of the story; it makes you like you were thrown right in the middle of a crazy carnival and you're just trying to figure out what the heck is happening around you. You'd think that feeling would go away after some time but nope, it lasts you through the entire novel.

To begin with, I couldn't stand the protagonist, Rachel. I'm going to blame the writing because I don't think I've met such a random (not in a good way) character. There were times when I felt like the author Rachel was going for funny by trying to write, what she assumed, was the way teenage girls think but really, it just didn't work for me. The girl's thoughts and the story jumps from one random event to another and it's all so abrupt that a lot of times, nothing really makes sense.

But.

(Yeah, there's a but).

I get the idea for the story. Normally, despite the messiness, this book would've made an entertaining read as the plot doesn't completely suck. It's about a teenage girl trying to deal with what's happening around her and obviously, things don't go well. I just wish it was written better. Maybe if the author traded the protagonist for a sane better one, added more pages in between chapters to fill the gaps (so it doesn't feel so abrupt and random), Intentions would've got a higher rating from me.

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